She's alive!  I haven't blogged since...well...May 2010. That's a normal hiatus I'd say. Between getting married and becoming a mom...to a new puppy, I have been pretty busy. I would say I've missed y'all but then I'd be lying and no one likes reading blogs written by liars.

Soon enough I'm going to write a quick mashup post about the past two years and why my life has been so much better than perfect and you should envy me etc. I'm kidding, but my life has been wonderful and I only have great news to tell. A man promised in front of God and both of our families that he'd put up with me the rest of his life, what's not great and wonderful about that?

Moving on...Like many of y'all, I have dabbled on Pinterest quite a bit. I've dubbed the site evil actually and have quite the love/hate relationship with it. I love it because I find so many things I didn't know I wanted to buy but all of a sudden I decide I must have these things or my life is incomplete. I hate it for the same reason. See that? Love/Hate, blowing your mind.

While browsing Pinterest's batrillion pins I've found quite a few crafts that I want to make, as well as super fattening recipes; but only the ones that make fat go right to your boobs and no where else.

About a year and a half ago I found a craft 'how-to' on making your own wedding ornament. Say what to the what? I fell in love instantly and promised myself I would make it one day. If you know me, you know I don't know how to sew, not even a button on a shirt. I don't know how to glue stuff accurately. I don't know how to use stencils or how to cut in a straight line. However, I do know how to fill a clear ball up with scraps of paper therefore this ornament craft was do-able.

This weekend I bought the supplies to finally create the ornament and read up on the 'how-to' guide Here. Short, sweet, and super easy. Let's do this!

Here are my supplies:
  1. Clear Ornament - Glass or Plastic - $1-$3.00 (Michaels)
  2. Charms - $1.00 each (Michaels)
  3. Two wedding invitations (My Own... duh)
  4. Fake flower petals (My Own from previously trying to make bouquets, not even going into that story)
  5. Bow to tie on top (My Own - taken from a wedding gift it was wrapped around)

Here's how it's done:
  1. I cut the first invitation into strips. That chick's directions said to do quarter inch strips but unfortunately for most brides we all don't have invites with small text or the same text throughout.
    1. Forget the quarter strips, I'm just going to hack this thing up. I cut each line it's own way.
  2.  Once I cut up the invite, I curled each strip around a pen, like so (pretend you can see me doing it), to make the strips curly-ish.
  3. Then, easy peasy, I inserted the strips into the ornament and, according to the 'how-to' guide, I'm basically done! WOOO!
  4. Viola!
Pa-thet-ic - Miserably inadequate.

Welp...not what I was expecting. I twirled my pen around in there a few times and all the strips still coiled into each other. Damage control time...
  1. (This should say 6 but I don't know how to fix it so deal with it) I proceeded to use my extra second invitation and cut it into strips like the first one. I thought by adding more strips I'd get more volume, and of course I was right. I should be a science teacher.
  2. I still wasn't getting the pretty result that the 'how-to' poster told me I'd get. Grrrr.  I then decided to add some pieces of the fake flowers that I had.
  3. I stuck my pen back in the ornament, whirled everything around a few times and BAM this is what I got...

Bird is helping with the inspection.
  1. (This should say a different number than 1) Now we're making some head way. It's time to close the sucker up and add the finishing touches. I put the top back on the ornament and tied a little piece of ribbon around the loop on the top. On that piece of ribbon I hung the two charms I purchased; a seashell (for our beach wedding) and a 'K' for our last name.
  2. I grabbed a ribbon I had saved from a wedding gift, cut it to size, and tied it on the top.
  3. Here's my finished product!

I just love it don't you? My husband said we should make one every year...I'm not sure how that will work out. I don't plan on another wedding. Maybe we should cut up his GameInformer magazine and stick strips of it in a ornament each year so he'll never forget which video games were the coolest at that time in his life. I'll think about it...

Don't you love how the title has nothing to do with anything at all? I do.

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some text Wife & Mother to Eva the Diva

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